Monday, November 16, 2015

Janet Flash: Hidden

by Michael Seese

So in between distributing popcorn for the Cub Scouts and ... you know, living ... I had to find time to write my story for Janet Reid's latest 100-word adventure. Our mission was to include:


Literally as  started typing in the basics of this post on Saturday afternoon, I came up with the idea of doing something like Kakfa's The Metamorphosis, albeit with with a beetle. That gave me the opening line, which became "Hidden."

A beetle scurries beneath the icebox, ignoring the amorphous fuzzy gray blob lying there.

I work frantically to clean. They'll be here soon, and I want everything to be spotless. Though I do love having guests, they leave such a mess. Bit by bit, I get everything tidied up, stowing the mop scant seconds before the knock on the door. Answering, I am cool as a cucumber.

"No, officer. I don't recognize her. Mutilated, you say? That's horrible. Yes, I'll lock my doors, and report any suspicious people. Thank you."

In time, I will find the finger under the fridge.

As you can see, this is nothing like Kakfa's tale of a man who becomes a cockroach-like bug. What can I say? My muse rarely listens to my ideas.

The problem with posting this late is, the results already have been announced. Though I didn't win, I did make the short list.

Here are Janet's comments:

Only after that last sentence do you realize the guest leaving "such a mess" are not in fact the same people coming to the door.

That last sentence is like flipping an image from positive to negative: same lines, but you see everything very differently.

That's an incredible feat, particularly with so few words.

Not bad for a Monday.

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