by Michael Seese
In a display of what I assume is mid-COVID ennui, literary agent Janet Reid proclaimed herself "so ready for the end of this week," and some "lollygagging."
That led to the (not officially named) "Lollygagger Contest."
(In case you don't recognize the image, that's the Lollygaggers scene from "Bull Durham.")
We needed to use the words:
in our 100-word story.
I immediate thought about break "loll" into "LOL! (something). And I pretty quickly hit upon the idea of "Fall-down Comedy."
Nervous hands fumbling with the microphone, I thanked grace that owing to the venue, they couldn't see the fear sprawled across my face.
I cleared my throat.
"Good evening, folks. So... anyone here from out of town?"
Apparently, irony doesn't translate well.
"I feel good. I've spent weeks training for this," I said, flexing my thumbs.
More silence, the wickedest of marplots.
Then the heckling started.
"Could this be more boring?"
"I wish you could hear me snore."
I hastily switched off the phone, thus ending my first—and last—foray into the world of SMS stand-up.
Sometimes the serious ones resonate with her, and sometimes the funny ones do. We'll see what this week brings.